November 3, 2008
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Well, Halloween is behind us once again. In fact, as someone pointed out earlier in history class this morning, it's already the third of November.
It was a good weekend. I love going home. I'm so much more comfortable there and I get to do what I want whenever I want. Here, I have to walk everywhere or ask someone else to drive me. Because I don't have a car, my travels are very limited. It's very annoying. Hopefully, by next year, I will have some sort of transportation so I won't be stuck on campus for weeks without getting away.
Friday night was enjoyable. I got to see people I haven't in a while. Including him. This last month was the longest we've ever gone without seeing each other. Frankly, it didn't feel very long at all. This distance thing isn't as bad as I thought it would be. I guess that's because I know he'll always be home waiting for me.
But, that other boy... Ugh, what am I going to do with him? I know he's upset and he should be. I kind of ruined everything between us. But, it just wasn't meant to be.
He's starting to realize this, I think. Apparently, I'm "a lost cause." Whatever that means. It makes me sad that it had to end up this way. I'd like to blame him for it, so I think I will. When it comes down to what caused it, the amount of time it took for him to actually figure everything out was what made it too difficult. And I had basically moved on.
I realized this when I was at the party, as I stood there with my boyfriend behind me as he walked away. And then again, when he waved to me from his register while he was working. It won't ever work between us and I'm in love with someone else.
I hope you had a happy Halloween.
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